The road to ‘getting there’.

I just figured that doing everything I want… is not exactly what I want.

A year ago, I was in the mindset that once I start to earn my own money, I’d make everything happen without restrictions. Probably that explains why for the past 8 months that I’ve been working, I still have no savings. :)) I enjoyed every bit of dime I earned. Shopping, food tripping with my boyfriend, pampering myself, and going on night outs with friends are most of the not-so-irrelevant stuff my paycheck gets entitled to. The hell to Carpe Diem! I get depressed when I go home straight from work, or when i dont have a fun Friday night… until today. (Or maybe it depends on my mood? haha)

Suddenly, I look at my closet and see how much there is and how messy it has gotten for having to house all the stuff I bought for the past few months. Suddenly, my favorite restaurants have demerit themselves into becoming into some lousy fast food chains. Suddenly, I lacked enthusiasm into torturing my liver with different vodka, tequila, and whisky mixes. I am getting old. I started to realize the value of rest during weekends. I thought that, ‘Hey, there’s no need to rush the fun. You still have your entire lifetime ahead of you.’

I’ve got to admit that all these coping are somewhat related to how much Im used to having people around me. You see, anonymous reader, there’s this thing called school that introduced me to the idea that my friends’ farthest could only be one seat apart. Anything exceeding that would trigger, “Omg she’s mad at me!!!” mode. I used to be with them everyday. We managed to have good times every single day, and now it happens less and less. Doing the things that were once out of habit before, are relatively harder to even plan now. Well I… I pretty much have grown to the situation. :) Not accepting change would only make things more difficult.   

xx,

Naz :)